“Excuse me?”

 

“You stole my uterus.”

 

“Ma’am, we’ve never met,” I said.  “We don’t know one another,” as she continued to picket in front of the dealership.

 

“Well, my name is Tom Kline and it’s nice to meet you,” as I extended my hand in friendship.

 

She looked at me, then looked at my hand, then looked at me, and then continued to walk with her sign protesting the dealership.  She was 5 foot nothing with a wrinkly face and walked awkwardly from side to side.  And here I was walking along the sidewalk, suddenly addressing a situation for which I had not planned on that day.

 

I inquired, “Ma’am why don’t you come inside and we can talk about whatever is troubling you. It’s must be over one hundred degrees out here, so come on in and we can have a cold Coke and discuss it.”

 

She kept on walking.

 

“Ma’am?”

 

No response.

 

“May I please ask you one question then?” I tried.

 

She stopped.

 

“Did you buy a product or service from us that you’re dissatisfied with?” still trying.

 

“No,” she snapped. “You stole my uterus,” and handed me a folded set of papers.

 

I scanned the slightly torn and wadded up pages very quickly. It was a narrative of how “someone” had forcibly made her have surgery where they removed her uterus.  I thought to myself, “this woman needs some help… from some kind of professional…a mental health professional.”

 

I told the woman I wanted to help her and then asked if I could go inside and make a copy of the papers. To my surprise, she said, “yes.”

 

While inside, I consulted with my brother and we agreed I should try to get her inside where: we could talk quietly; I could see how I could help her; perhaps I could call social services and get her some assistance.

 

I returned to the sidewalk and started to walk with her. Then, I said, “well if you’re going to picket, I’m going to picket with you.”

 

She gave me an ugly look.  A super ugly look.  I’ll bet she thought to herself, “Boy is this guy crazy!”

 

Eventually, through some conversation, some persuasion, and the help of a really humid and awfully hot day, I was able to get her inside.  Later, I got her some help which she appeared to need so badly.

 

I hadn’t thought “picket interrupter” was in my job description but I guess it was listed under “other duties as assigned.”

 

Over my thirty (30) years, we had picketers more than once.  More on that later in the article.

 

How you talk to customers, or a not-customer, in this case, and employees is fundamentally important. We are required to solve problems, all kinds of them.  In my experience, you will have the best result when you are speaking clearly, calmly, and without tone in your voice.  It’s the tone which can be your greatest asset or your biggest liability.  Tone doesn’t help.

 

How can you tell if you’re speaking with tone?  Record a video of yourself having a difficult conversation.  Practice it.  Then, watch it and see what emotions are flowing through the video.  Ask a few colleagues if you are not sure.

 

Back to picketing.

 

Years ago, one of our dealer’s manufacturers was having problems with one of their many unions.  The local chapter decided to picket against the dealership because we sold their products.   In this case, we had to communicate in a different way to get our point across.  The resulting agreement was an Agreement Not To Picket Or Handbill.  Unfortunately, I had to use this release language in at least one more situation years later.

 

Back to our original picketer…because I know you’re curious, release language looks like this:

 

“Customer acknowledges that she is active in promoting her political beliefs and her political agenda which includes, but is not limited to, political activism against the proliferation of the medical procedures commonly referred to as hysterectomies. Customer also acknowledges that her political beliefs have no nexus or relation to the Company’s business which is in the sale and service of motor vehicles.  Customer acknowledges that her prior picketing of the Company’s premises has caused the Company to lose customers, business, and profits.  By reason of the above, Customer agrees not to picket, handbill, or otherwise discourage customers or potential customers from the Company and further agrees not to picket, handbill, or promote her political agenda within 1000 feet of any of the Company’s place of business.”

 

We are in a people business.  Odd things happen.  People get emotional, especially during the holidays.    Some need help.  Some want leverage to get something from you.  Emotional folks don’t react reasonably, rationally, or even in their own best interest.  More often than not, it is incumbent upon us to guide them to where they need to go.  This requires patience, ingenuity, and creativity. Don’t be afraid to ask questions and try to bond in order to get an edge toward a relationship.  Remember, people respond to people they like and to whom they can relate.

 

I align here with the brilliant and (unfortunately) now-deceased comedian Mitch Hedberg, “I’m against picketing, but I don’t know how to show it.”

 

Be nimble on your feet and be prepared to deal with the unusual.  The unusual happens, I promise.